Holiday Adverts

My current vice is watching YouTube travel videos. (Maybe I’ll start a channel one day) . In that I don’t pay for the Tube I get ads between and during the videos. Currently, it bring dummer (allegedly) in.the uk, these are largely holiday ads. Many of these are for branded packages to sunny climes. Every fibre of my screams ‘noooooo’ when I see these. I love a bit of luxury, but I’m not averse to a hostel either what I loathe with a passion is tourist hotels. Now I know that when travelling for pleasure you cannot escape the fact that everyone is a tourist. Do not fool yourselves ‘digital nomads’ you’re just tourists with a computer.

What sparked my rant today is an ad for a Hard Rock Hotel. Now, I have an extensive collection of Hard Rock pins, and I’ve spent many a happy hour feeding my face in the cafes as I grew up. I tend to avoid them now. (Please contact me if you want to buy any Hard Rock pins) in preference for local small businesses. Locally run cafes tend to offer better food. I’m no angel. I use air bnbs. On the whole, we tend to look for homes that people actually live in and rent when they’re not there. That’s as it was intended before it was corrupted as a business taking a lot of viable small homes out of the housing market. I rarely use hotels. I stay with friends and they stay with us. Tourist central with the noise and pools and buffet breakfast queue… if you’ve read the Australia posts, you’ll know that was the most disappointing aspect of our visit to Yalara.

Don’t get me wrong I’m lucky enough to not be taking kids with me (I love my nieces, and we’re meeting them and their parents abroad at some point this year) we can pick and choose. We can go during term time, not in peak periods. It can be much quieter when we travel. If I had tips for anyone, these are they. Do not travel to major tourist traps. There are many underrated places on this planet. Walk where you can. Take public transport where possible. (I know that is not possible in the USA, for example). Drunk and shouting by or in the pool daytime or 3am it’s not a good look on anyone. Respect people, and generally, you’ll find they help you, and you’ll find hidden gems and have wonderful experiences that the herd miss.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a train journey to Matchu Pitchu to watch….

Repeat

I have a confession to make. I do consumer competitions. You know the ones splashed down your chocolate bar or on a nifty collar on your fave tipple…WIN….money, a holiday, car, plastic novelty item, tickets… Another confession. I have won several such prize draws and tests of skill. The point being they are designed to affect your spending choices and to attract your loyalty. I get a magazine with all such ‘contests’ available to me listed. I do t even have to buy the thing (unless that’s an entry requirement). There are also secret oiine cabals with free listings….they even publish the answers.

My point being that way back,I those heady days before the pandemic, I won a two night trip to a rather swanky place. Hoar Cross Hall (Not sponsored) As a marketing ploy it was successful as we go back annually global circumstances permitting. My absence is due to one such brief voyage. We spent 36 glorious hours mainly underground and submerged in water… except when being therapeutically pummelled or Michelin star fed. This is the first occasion I don’t recall seeing a TV or other celeb. There was however a wedding and I realised that I’d previously missed the chapel and a walk around the church which stands in the grounds.

My parents hate the very idea of the’spa’. That’s OK they weren’t invited. Buying time away from the everyday even for a moment, even a fairground ride or a film, is something everyone dies in their own way. A walk at the beach need cost nothing, also true for urban exploration. Take some time. Sit. Think. Play.

How to be a great guest

I’m sure a lot if you will have gone “Air b’n’b” at some point. Not sponsored. If not do try it it’s great fun. (Yes, I am aware of the arguments about it ruining the housing market for first time buyers).We prefer to have place to come back to where you can cook and have privacy unlike a youth hostel though we have used those too. (I should say many hostels now have smaller private rooms not all dorms). Being able to slob out in your pants (underwear for my US chums) and not worry about housekeeping or dorm mates is a plus but mostly being able to cook and eat at random times and for less than a meal out is where the joy is for us.

We’ve been to a few places all over the world. Usually we communicate in English but it’s polite to try whatever language even if it’s via Google translate and with apologies. That’s a good start to endearing yourself to the host. Now I’m sure people are aware that guests rank the host when they leave and getting a ‘superhost’ rank pretty much ensures that you’re booked up so most will try hard to please. Were you aware that hosts can and do rank guests too? You definitely want to get on the 5 star guest list as it helps you grab those difficult to book spaces. Our hosts tend to remember us for all the right reasons. Put it this way, it’s our wedding anniversary and a previous host has especially invited us back to celebrate!

Rule one. Read the reviews. There’s often detail in there that you might miss. For example a host may have pets and you may have allergies even if the pet is not allowed in the rental space. Do your research about the area as well. One time, in Paris, a perfectly lovey flat was marred by having to climb over drunks asleep in the doorway on the way in every night.

Rule two. Be polite. It costs nothing. Be up front if you gave particular needs or requests. Will you be arriving late at night or need to dropbags off early before the space is cleaned? We always check for gay friendliness.

Rule three. Remember this is someone’s home and their business. If the rule is shoes off at the door and everyone sits to pee (this is a real place and we loved it) then so be it. Their house their rules.

Rule four. Be considerate. If you’re sharing  space with the host then keep the noise down and keep hallways tidy for example.

Rule five. Clear up before you leave. Dry the dishes, put things away, strip the bed, take out the rubbish. If necessary throw away perishable food stuffs. Tne room may not be used for some time and your stinky sour milk will not be appreciated. On the other hand tinned or dried foods left for other guests can be an act of kindness (and lightens your luggage).

Rule six. Leave a thank you note. We do this as a matter of course. It means you can point out any minor issues (if there are any) without putting them in your review. One host had a guest point out an issue before we arrived one morning and greeted us to explain the he would give us his home for the night while the tiny tiny issue was fixed. What service. To be honest if there is an issue it’s best to contact the host straight away.

We always take a gift. Usually a couple of food items made very locally to our home if we are allowedtobring them across any border or another typical item from home. Sometimes we give this as we arrive. If we can we invite out host for a home cooked meal or drink but this is not always practical. *I would not do this if traveling alone for example.

We’ve stayed in a tiny crazy attic flat, a smelly basement (that was an early one), a converted garage, and a “tree house with a pool” (that one’s in Australia). Air b’nb have always been really helpful….like that time someone tried to rent their student room in halls as a ‘studio flat’ … look, it’s an adventure. Be respectful and kind, you’ll be treated well.

The Lady Vanishes

I know, Harrogate. Scene of Agatha Christie’s disappearance. I know, spa town, source of sulphourus waters. Actually I didn’t know about the Egyption connection with its own diggers on Howard Carter’s team. Its a pretty great place for a day or two…if you don’t mind hills.

Hotel staircase

The hotel was antwacky. Mainly and elderly clientele but with a few families thrown in for good measure. Staff ever so polite. I bet the place was quite something when it had its own Turkish baths now sadly closed (although the ones in town are still open but heavily booked well in advance). There were a number of sepia photos in the lobby (formerly known as the Winter Gardens).

Day one dump bags saunter into town for lunch. Quirky bistro called the Quirky Farm. Not fast food but well worth the wait. Then on to a row of small, locally owned shops to buy fabric and best of all collect a couple of Angela Brazil novels which I didn’t yet possess. Any visit to any town with an antiquarian and second hand book store is a joy and a privilege. Diner served at 7.30 after a G’n’T in the bar. Well managed carvery style cutting down on staff as the hotel had suffered the double blow of COVID 19 and Brexit taking its staff.

Day two. Leisurely breakfast (all you can eat buffet style) and check out before wandering in to visit the Pump House museum although we did not take the waters. Found the local gallery with its exhibition of spa towns around the world in photos, paintings and historic documents. By now it was almost time … we walked slowly encountering a chap selling some sort of cd from a rack besides his beautifully restored Austin 7. Now I have a soft spot for these little gems as my dad owned one which he restored, and won prizes with, when I was much younger. I was small enough to comfortably climb through the gap for the back window then. Don’t think I could do that now. To anyone who has yet to visit a vintage car and/or steam rally with its colour, noise and smell or oil and coal I suggest that you vet to one soon before they become impossible with a ban on fossil fuel.

Mini cakes

The highlight of the midweekend (not actually a weekend but we pretended it was anyway) was afternoon tea at Betty’s. Harrogate officionados will be familiar with the queue of around 40 minutes just for tea and a cake. We took the civilised option and booked. The Imperial Room above the main shop and cafe is all that you’d imagine. White linen cloths, potted palms and impeccably dressed staff. A live pianist playing in one corner. Every care was taken to ensure allergens were removed and we ate. More sandwiches, no problem. Another pot of tea? Certainly. All in the price.

I recommend the concept of the midweekend. Some might call it a mini retirement or a holiday. All I know is that a couple of days looking at a different place is good for the soul. BTW we didn’t join in with the TaiChi in the park but may e we should have.